Monday, May 2, 2011

Heal

This is a poem I wrote at some point "early" in my days of dealing with anxiety. Since I'm approaching 8 years of dealing with panic attacks I'm not sure how I define "early" but I know this poem was written at some point prior to 2005 and so it was somewhere between 0 and 3 years "in".
Heal


Sometimes I feel like
I want to heal
the world
Sometimes it seems like
I can do anything
But then sometimes
I realize
that I’m human
and I can’t do
anything.
I lie awake in my bed
curled up like an infant
wanting to leave
it all
behind
I cry out to you
but I’m not sure
you hear
I want you to hold
me
but I’m not sure
you care
I’m shaking
now
I’m not awake
now
but my sleep
doesn’t offer me
peace
Dreams are nightmares
a focusing of my
thoughts
into a light beam
I don’t want
to see.

I remember writing this poem after reading the latest blog entry of Panicking Teen (http://panickingteen.blogspot.com/2011/05/memory-lane.html?showComment=1304390356024#c628135663217544078)


1 comment:

  1. 1. I can really relate to this poem. Especially the part when you say that you want "you" to hold me and you feel like "you" can't hear when you scream out. That's exactly how I feel at times.
    2. I love your poem. I think it captures anxiety and panic beautifully and extememly accurately.
    3. Thanks for citing me ! That makes me really happy :)

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